7 Major ESTJ Weaknesses & How to Manage Them (2024)

Knowing your weaknesses helps you make the right choices in life. If you are unaware of your blind spots or shortcomings, you are doomed to navigate experiences and relationships that divert you from the right track.

We all have weaknesses to work with. Instead of beating yourself up about it, you can embrace them with courage and deal with them accordingly.

The two biggest ESTJ weaknesses are their inflexibility and difficulty adapting to unexpected events.

ESTJ Weaknesses

1. Inflexible

One of the biggest ESTJ weaknesses is these individuals’ rigid mindsets. The Judgement trait (J) of their personality makes them find the most adequate way to approach things. As a result, they fixate on it and reject any other possibility, even if it could have more satisfactory outcomes.

This ESTJ flaw manifests more in their work life. When these personalities are used to a way of performing their tasks and the management changes, they will become stubborn. ESTJs refuse to embrace new methods if the ones they do still work.

How to Deal With it 

• This ESTJ negative trait can be minimized if these personalities find the logic behind other people’s views. They could become more flexible if the new approaches prove to be effective and not just mere opinions.
• ESTJs could avoid their lack of flexibility by reminding themselves that they are only humans and there are no absolute truths.
• They can also practice being objective and open their minds to others’ opinions and decisions.

2. Dealing With New Experiences

Another weakness for ESTJ is its struggle to cope with new or unconventional situations. These individuals stick to tradition and try to sustain the status quo wherever they go. They don’t feel comfortable when forced to try new solutions.

This deficiency is caused by their fear of questioning their own methods. They don’t want to give up on what has always worked in the past, especially if the unconventional solution seems risky.

For example, imagine someone asking an ESTJ personality to try a new apple pie recipe that doesn’t include the same ingredients their grandmother, great-grandmother, and great-great-grandmother used. They will feel anxious and convince that person to stick to their time-honored formula.

How to Deal With it 

• This ESTJ problem can be minimized if they start with small new things and gradually work their way up.
• These individuals can also try to acknowledge times when unconventional methods lead to a more sustainable society.
• ESTJs can try a new way of managing a problematic issue and write down the positive outcomes.

3. Too Concerned With the Public eye

Another ESTJ negative quality is their concern for their public image. They have strong beliefs about what’s right or wrong for society and take pride in maintaining a righteous appearance in front of others.

This personality weakness stems from the Extraversion trait (E) of their character. They have the compulsion to meet others’ expectations, regardless of their own needs. 

For example, an ESTJ individual may want to stay home instead of meeting colleagues for a work event. Even though they don’t like the people attending it, they will still force themselves to go to avoid other people’s judgment.

How to Deal With it 

• They can minimize this negative personality trait by prioritizing their needs instead of those they don’t care for.
• ESTJ can overcome this shortcoming by spending time alone and nurturing their self-esteem.
• These personalities can manage this weakness by stopping chasing people’s approval.

4. Relaxing

One of the most difficult ESTJ problems is their inability to relax. These individuals are ambitious and hard workers, always striving to be inspiring examples to follow.

As a result, they don’t allow themselves to take a break or enjoy their leisure time. They believe that relaxing will cause them to lose dignity, risking making a fool of themselves in front of others.

This ESTJ weakness at work can make them look like the most effective person in the office. They arrive first and leave last, completing their tasks ahead of time and surprising everyone with their performance. However, they neglect their emotional and psychological well-being in the process.

How to Deal With it

• These individuals can avoid this negative ESTJ characteristic by striking an adequate work-life balance.
• ESTJs could list the areas where this weakness causes conflict (like their health or relationships) to motivate themselves to relax.
• These personalities could manage this potential problem area by connecting with nature and practicing meditation.

5. Connecting With Emotions

Another problematic characteristic of ESTJ personalities is their inability to express their emotions. The Thinking (T) trait gives them a rational approach to life. They are so concerned with facts and methods that they forget to regard other people’s feelings.

These individuals know how to meet society’s expectations. They know what’s right or wrong within their given culture and background but fail to understand what makes other people happy.

For example, a detour can be a beautiful experience for their family members. This change of paths could lead them to discover enchanting places with breathtaking scenery. However, the ESTJ personality will be upset because they will arrive an hour later than scheduled.

How to Deal With it 

• They can overcome this ESTJ personality weakness by focusing on the similarities they share with others rather than their differences.
• These individuals could practice putting themselves in the other person’s shoes as often as possible to increase their empathy.
• Another way of overcoming this weakness is by sharing their emotional experiences with their loved ones more often.

6. Letting Go of Control

Another aspect of the ESTJ personality that has room for improvement is their urge to control everything. This personality trait stems from their fear of disorder and lack of rules.

Therefore, they try to control every aspect of their own and other people’s lives. This ESTJ weakness in relationships is especially problematic. They sabotage their love life by forcing their significant other to stick to a certain way of being.

These personalities attempt to control their partner’s actions, decisions, and interactions, which pushes them away sooner or later.

How to Deal With it

• ESTJs could manage this shortcoming by getting an outside perspective instead of fixating on their own.
• These individuals could become aware of how this personality trait negatively affects their lives in the long run.
• They can explore the limiting beliefs behind this behavior and transform them into kinder ones.

7. Tolerating Opposite Viewpoints

ESTJ personalities can’t simply disagree with others without stirring up trouble. They are blunt when stating their opinions, upsetting others in the process.

This attribute emerges from their conviction that there is a right and only way of approaching life. These individuals hate arguing because of their personalities’ Sensing (S) trait. They stick to what their senses can perceive and dismiss all other arguments with disdain.

If an ESTJ personality hears someone talk about synchronicities or the law of attraction, they will laugh at their face and make them feel ashamed for believing in that.

How to Deal With it 

• ESTJ could minimize this weakness by not communicating their negative opinions tos everyone they meet.
• These individuals could achieve personal growth by opening up to other people’s unique perspectives.
• They could manage this shortcoming by honoring other people as well as their personal experiences.

FAQ

What is ESTJs weakest function?

ESTJs weakest function is their lack of flexibility and stubbornness.

What do ESTJs struggle with?

ESTJs struggle with their fear of change and inability to embrace unconventional solutions.

What do ESTJs fear the most?

ESTJs fear a lack of order and control in their lives and surroundings.

What annoys the ESTJs the most?

What annoys the ESTjs the most are people who don’t follow the rules and express their opinions as if they were facts.

What is the dark side of ESTJs?

The dark side of ESTJs is their lack of empathy and blunt way of expressing their opinions.

What annoys people about ESTJs?

People feel annoyed by ESTJs’ inability to embrace different methods or solutions, even if they bring positive outcomes.

What are ESTJs misunderstood as?

ESTJs are misunderstood in their relationships. They appear harsh and uncaring because they value reason over emotions, but they do care for their loved ones.

What stresses out ESTJs the most?

ESTJs feel more stressed when forced to try unconventional solutions or methods.

How to improve ESTJ weaknesses?

ESTJs can improve their weaknesses by being more flexible and putting themselves in other people’s shoes.